Open Letter to Ladies Who Think "All Guys are The Same"

Dear Sisters,

It is very regrettable that most of you resent us so much. In spite of this, most of us in most cases do not reciprocate your resentment towards us. Those of us who do this do it for one major reason: whether we like it or not you ladies will always be our mothers, sisters, girlfriends, fiancées and wives and the cycle will continue on and on.

While we may put up with you on many things, one thing most of us can’t stand, which we wish you could change is your rather ‘erroneous’ perception that all guys are the same. I am writing this letter to all the ladies out there and hope to, at the end, prove to you all that all guys are not the same! So let’s get into it.

I've found there are two types of ladies. The first type thinks that all guys are the same. Sadly, I've found that ladies with this ideology hardly find true love because (1) they most often encounter bad guys which reiterate their belief that “all guys are the same.” (2) They never realize it when a good guy comes around and treats him with the same resentment they would treat the bad guys.

I also realize that the perception that all guys are the same is just the symptoms; the real cause of such notion is a history of abuse by men, fathers, uncles, brothers, bad relationships. This is what had created such a bad and sometimes very evil notion about guys in the minds of these ladies.

Many a time, the ladies who have this perception that "all guys are the same" easily become players, moving from one guy to another, and they may also easily fall prey to temptations of lesbianism. So, what often starts as a mere resentment of the male figure could deteriorate into something serious and detestable such as lesbianism and promiscuity.

What can one do if she finds herself in the situation described above? Well, I wish I have a perfect answer, but honestly I don't. So I will just suggest two solutions. The first solution is God. Yes, the reason many women resent men so badly is because they have been hurt in the past and have not healed completely. If you are going to heal completely from the hurts of the past then you are going to need God's help to do that. Jesus Christ came to the earth as a Saviour, but also as a Healer. The scriptures say, "By his stripes we are healed" (Isaiah 53:5). So trust God to heal you from all the hurts of the past and pray for grace to approach life with a renewed sense of hope.

The second thing one could do is to stop generalizing. There are millions of men in this world and if indeed you have been hurt by some, the number will be very minute if compared to the average number of men in your country or community. So with all due respect, I think it is unfair to use the misbehaviour of the 'few' men you have encountered as a yardstick to say that all men are the same. Learn to use the legal principle, "every suspect is innocent until proven otherwise". In other words, think of all people to be potentially good until you have cause to doubt their integrity. This will ensure you don't treat good guys badly when they come around.

Now back to the second type of ladies in the world. The second type is those who may have been equally hurt by men in the past, but unlike the first group, these think that most guys are the same but there are still good guys out there. Know the difference: the first group thinks "all guys are the same" but the second group thinks "most guys are the same but there are still good guys out there".

Due to the notion of the second group that there are still good guys out there, they use what I call the "back up plan". That is, they fall in love initially with just one foot forward, study the guy carefully, and if he is good then they then give him their hearts completely.

In life we don't always get what we want, but with wisdom and faith in God, we can conquer every problem and live a joyful life. Issues of the heart have to be dealt with carefully and we will therefore be blessed to follow the command in Proverbs 4:23: "Keep thy heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life"

What All Gay People Must Know: The Abnormality of Homosexuality

The problem with homosexuality is that it is unnatural. Assume that you have a daughter who's six (6) years old. Now one day upon returning from work you see this young girl in bed having sex with a man of about 20 years. What will be your immediate reaction? Then to make things worse, imagine you asked your daughter about the incidence and she tells you she's attracted to older men. Would you accept such attraction as normal? Please, let's be realistic. The natural order is for someone of one sex to desire another of the opposite sex. Anything short of that is perverted and unnatural.

Many gays also argue that gay sex is just another sin but that's a weak argument. Every wrongdoing is sin but there are sins that lead unto death and those that do not. Homosexuality is not just a sin but also an abomination. It is detestable and abnormal.

In law, there's a clear distinction between what a crime is and what a tort is even though they are both wrongs committed by people. Crimes are considered heavier than torts because they are wrongs against the whole of humanity and not just one person. For example, murder is considered a crime because it is believed that the murderer is a threat to the entire society and not just the victim. Torts on the other hand, are wrongs against individual persons which does not pose a threat to the entire community. It is the same with homosexuality. Homosexuality is a sin like any other wrong but it is an abominable sin. It is unnatural and

should never be encouraged.

Is being gay a choice or not? I believe it is both a choice and also demonic. Being gay is a demonic perversion of the natural order. Now that is the starting point. The individual has to make the choice weather to satisfy his attraction to another of his/her own kind. A preacher once discovered that he's dispositionally gay but because of his love for Christ, he never satisfied his desires by having sex with a man. As a straight and unmarried guy, I have a high inclination every now and then to go find a girl and have sex with her. But that’s fornication and I know better. Sex was designed for marriage and that is how it has to be. Just because I desire to be with a girl does not mean I should go in for one while unmarried.

So the existence of a proclivity is not justification to satisfy it. If this is the case then the world must brace itself for more surprises because the arguments that would be used to attempt to normalize homosexuality would soon be applied to normalize other abnormalities such as sadism, masochism, pedophilia and misogyny just to mention a few.

Please don’t get me wrong; I don't hate gays, I detest the act of homosexuality just as I don't hate criminals but detest the act of crime. As a Christian, I am, per my beliefs, to love everybody. Now, there's BIG difference between accepting people and accepting their abnormal lifestyles. The church is a place for sinners who consider their ways as sinful and therefore seeking redemption, not sinners who are seeking their sins to be accepted as normal behaviour. Any church that accepts homosexuality as being normal is not worthy of being called a Christian Church because being gay and being a Christian are so divergent that they can never meet. God bless you!

7 Reasons Why It is Good to Marry

Yesterday was Francis and Bridget’s wedding. When are you having yours?

In a world where you have a wedding that cost about twenty million dollars ($20m) end in 72 days, it quite make a lot of sense to have a lot of people dreading marriage and turning a deaf ear when the topic is brought up. Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’ wedding reportedly cost $20 million. This amount included $2 million Lorraine Schwartz engagement ring, Kim’s wedding dress costing about $20,000 and a $50,000 wedding day facelift for Kim Kardashian.  If these were not enough, Huffington Post reported that the venue for the wedding costs approximately $30 million.

Despite all these spending on the wedding, Kris and Kim called it quit in just 72 days after the nuptials. News of their divorce got world talking. Well, not just talking but people have begun questioning the integrity of one of the best gifts of God to mankind – marriage. People are rethinking their marriage decisions and finding alternatives. Here’s a question for you all: Is marriage worth the investment it requires in today’s world?

Mr. & Mrs. Francis Dunyoh (3/12/2011)

There’s no doubt that people are loosing faith in the institution of marriage and considering other alternatives. The recent increase in lesbianism, bisexuality and all homosexual activities in societies across the globe is evidence of the fact that people are loosing faith in the union of marriage. But there’s hope, a lot of it for that matter. In this article I share with you seven (7) reasons why I think it is good to marry. You are invited to share your thoughts, comments and feedback via the comment box at the end of the article.

In no particular order, the following are some reasons why it is good to marry:

How to Fix a Complicated Relationship

Are you in a relationship? Well, yes… but it’s complicated! Sounds familiar… huh? Well, it seems complicated relationships are the order of the day. It is pathetic but most people are really having hard times with their relationships and all that they can say about it is… it’s complicated! In this post, I want to share with you about how to fix complicated relationships. We will also look at some remedies to complicated relationships or what you must do if you have complications in your current relationship or should you find yourself in one in the future. Keep reading…

What is a complicated relationship? The Essential English Dictionary defines the word complicated as, “difficult to analyze or understand.” The word complicated can also be used to describe a problematical situation. A relationship is formed through mutual agreement between at least two people. Relationships always start off via mutual agreement between the partners involve. The partners jointly make the conscious decision to stay or be together, sharing each other’s pain and joy. When two people are in a relationship, or ‘in love,’ it is usually a “me and you against the world” kind of thing. Isn’t that beautiful? Well it is, until Mr. Complicated sets in, and when he comes, he turns every sweet thing into sour and blows off every fire of love. In a nutshell, a complicated relationship is one in which the partners had lost the Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) which was created at the beginning of the relationship, and thus find themselves disagreeing on the very things which brought them together in the first place.

What Does The Bible Say About Love?

What is love? In Mathematics; a problem, in History; a reaction, in Art; a Heart, and in Psychology, it is a feeling. So what really is love?

The Archbishop Duncan Williams once said, "If you don't understand something you can easily abuse it." This statement is very true. There is a big deal of misunderstanding about what love really is. In this post, I want us to take a look at what the Bible says about love. Remember to leave your comments below the post.

“Love is beautiful, it is patient, it is kind, it’s not selfish and it’s not puffed up [arrogant] (1 Corinthians 13). In John 15:13 Jesus said "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." From the above scripture, we see love manifesting itself as sacrificial. Love has a great deal to do with sacrifice. To love someone means to like and cherish them both for their strengths and for their weaknesses and imperfections. A lot of people do not understand and accept love as an act of sacrifice. Many people see love to be fun. Of course! Love is fun. Besides the fun, however, comes sacrifice.

Lead Your Heart Don't Follow It

“Follow your heart. Do what your heart tells you to do.” This was the advice a friend gave to one of my female friends who was caught up between two gentlemen. My friend had to choose between two gentlemen, each nice looking and with an encouraging personality. The two gentlemen had simultaneously proposed love to her. She was very confused because she liked both guys and didn’t want to hurt any of them. At the same time, she didn’t want to compromise her happiness and needed to make the best choice among the two men. As a Christian, what would you do if you find yourself in a similar situation? Will you follow your heart and do what it tells you to do?

Should we Christians follow our heart and do what it tells us to do. Some people give the whole concept a nice coat. They say, “The heart knows best.” Oh really? Can we trust our heart with our lives? What does the Bible say about this?

In Proverbs 4:23, the Bible says, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” Two words from this scripture need explanation. First, the word keep which means, to guide, to protect, and to lead. For the purpose of our learning, we will take word ‘keep’ to mean ‘to lead.’ The second word is ‘diligence’ which means, carefulness, conscientiousness and seriousness. We will go by seriousness. So in summary, God is telling us to lead our heart with all seriousness because out of the heart come all life issues. The lesson here is, lead your heart don’t follow it. God gave a good reason why we should lead our heart rather than follow it. He said, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? – Jeremiah 17:9.

God had made it very clear to us. We must not follow our hearts because the heart is deceitful. Many of the decisions we take with our hearts end in ruins. Marriages are breaking down, relationships are coming to a halt and businesses are collapsing all because the people involved listen to the voice of their hearts and followed it. Following our hearts will lead us nowhere than disappointment, regrets and shame. On the contrary, when we lead our heart we can be certain of a happy ending to the journey.

Dear reader, decide today to always lead your heart in everything you do. Don’t allow your heart to dictate anything to you, but use your mind to assess the choices of the heart and make sure you’re in full control of your life. Thanks for reading, kindly leave your comments below.

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